truth in twilight

The last time I wanted to write, I decided that I would write about what I was feeling at that time - very confused, not sure what I should have been feeling. I was going to write about jealousy, emptiness and extreme loneliness.

I was going to write about what I thought I was missing, from what seemed like a “loser’s” viewpoint. Not anymore.

What brought on this change? Believe it or not (and this is probably going to sound really stupid), I went to see Twilight on a whim last night. My friend and I wanted to go see a movie, and it was the only movie that wasn’t 2+ hours long. Believe me, I was skeptical. I’ve never liked vampires, let alone vampire movies. But, strangely, seeing the movie changed something inside me.

It’s, honestly, the first time I’ve felt a tangible longing. I’ve longed to see my family, my friends, my loved ones. But I’ve never physically felt a longing. It’s like it’s a desire, a craving that I can’t just turn away from. I’m not sure what to do with this new tangible longing, but hopefully it’ll be met/filled soon.

That’s really all I have to say right now. There’s really no way to explain any of this to anyone reading this without watering it down, so I’m not going to try.

That’s all.